I just realized something this morning.
As today is the kids last day of school before Christmas break, I realized that this will be our FIRST CHRISTMAS BREAK as a FAMILY since we were able to retire Chris last March.
It's weird - sometimes it still feels like a dream having him home and that tomorrow he'll wake up and have to go work overtime this weekend, or Sunday night I should be packing his lunch for his 13 hours being away on Monday. Sometimes I still remember those days when he had to work Christmas Eve and I dreaded it.
But it's not a dream that I only play out when I'm sleeping like I used to. Those 2 years of me building this with 3-4 little kids at home while he was at work paid off.
And now as we start Christmas Break, we don't only get to have him home on Christmas Eve night and Christmas Day. We get to take these 2 weeks and build Gingerbread houses TOGETHER, and go Christmas Caroling TOGETHER, to dance around and sing Christmas songs in the house by the Christmas lights...and as I try to type this with tears rolling down my cheeks....
I wish I could go back and tell that overwhelmed Mom who didn't believe in herself and who was so scared to fail and who thought this isn't for people like me, that it's for THOSE successful people who this comes easy for. NOT ME.
I wish I could go back and tell her THAT THIS IS FOR HER! This IS for those that have a dream deep inside, this is for those that WANT SOMETHING MORE, and your STRUGGLES ARE YOUR STORY! This is for those that want SOMETHING DIFFERENT! So CHIN UP! Pull up your big girl panties, wipe off the tears and USE YOUR FEARS to KEEP GOING.
I can't go back and erase my roller coaster journey though.
I CAN tell YOU..
You that's reading this.....
that doubts yourself too - that this is FOR YOU.
This is YOUR TIME to take a chance on your dreams. To quit that job and stay home with your kids. To overcome your struggles and turn them into triumphs. To reclaim your health and strength. To allow your husband to go do something he loves and be home more. To climb out of the OVERWHELM, whatever that is, and create FREEDOM.
I fought for it, during the hardest and move overwhelming stage of my life so far. Because I dreamed day in and day out what freedom of TIME, freedom of FINANCES, freedom from DEPRESSION, freedom from being OVERWEIGHT AND TIRED....
I knew what that would feel like. And for once in my life I took a chance on me, and I took a chance to change everything for my family and ran. And some days I could only walk. And some days I gave up. But I never gave up longer than that day.
I will cherish this Christmas Break and give a virtual hug to that Mom that I was back then and thank her for believing in herself to make this possible. But I will also fight for YOU so that you can have it too if that's what you dream of.
Let me help you get that freedom, whatever it looks like for you. YOU ARE WORTH IT.
XOXO,
Mindy
