Update from Nashville

UPDATE

We are never given more than we can handle. 
I'll admit, today I doubted this. I've wanted to punch someone in the face, I've wanted to scream and shout, I've cried, I've doubted that my faith is strong enough, but I've never asked WHY this blessing we've been given, was given to us. But today I asked WHY are we being tested again. We had 5 hours worth of consultations with the specialists from every department. So helpful, so educational, we learned so much more about Camden, but we had 1 more setback which will delay the surgery.

Camden is the PERFECT candidate..we learned more about the location of the defect, size and after the neurosurgeon that closes the spine saw his images..he said this will be amazing for him and will help him greatly.

But again..my dang placenta is being a pain. Apparently, when I had the amniocentesis done last week which was a requirement for the surgery, the needle poked my placenta and has created a decent size pocket of blood in my placenta which is a restriction for getting the surgery. The good news is, things like this can heal and they're hopeful that it will heal this week so we're getting another ultrasound on Friday and that will give us either a Yes to have surgery next Tuesday or we'll get our for sure No that isn't the plan for Camden.

Of course we've struggled with that after all the many miracles and blessings we've seen. We have definitely felt guided along this journey and although it hasn't been easy...we have grown so much in our abilities to move forward, to be strong, and how much our faith has increased. I love a quote that was left in a comment, "you cannot have fear and faith in your heart at the same time." This has been EXTREMELY difficult and definitely something that I've been being taught and will have to continue to work on over and over. I had to go through a whirlwind of emotions and struggle with: "WHY this is being delayed, What if we get a No on Friday after all of this. This is FAR from convenient..financially, we miss our kids, we don't want to interfere with other people's lives that are helping us, etc." But after an evening of letting ourselves go through this emotional roller coaster, and from listening to talks from the leaders of our church, listening to church music and prayer - we feel that peace...that undeniable peace that we need to stay and get our answer.

I don't know what that answer is. But I know that as I humble myself and turn Camden over to his Heavenly Father, that everything will be okay. That there IS a reason for all of this. That there are things we have learned ONLY through this process and things we will continue to learn as to WHY we went through this years down the road. We were not guided out here for NO reason. Of that I am sure. We simply need to Be Still, and Know that His plan will play out, and there IS a reason for all of it.

I started making a list of all of our blessings, of all the positives that have happened and it turned a devastated moment into another miracle. Chris's work has been AMAZING and there have been enough workers that donated their PTO to cover our stay out here..both weeks if necessary. People have gifted us money which has been a blessing in covering our travel expenses. Those loved ones watching our kids that brings us so much peace that they are being LOVED, and spoiled and this won't disrupt them at all. Chris and I get some quiet, peaceful alone time together to go through this and strengthen our marriage. And to all the hundreds of people praying for us - your faith and love humbles us and strengthens us. Thank You.

So that is our update  Friday we will know more and we'll keep praying!

This video has carried me through and I know that there are so many others out there going through hard times. Be Still and Know that He is God. It always works out in the end. Never Give Up. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCVT88Dz_CM